Saturday, October 10, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday October 9, 2026 - “Two Weeks Before Halloween” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Another week of jobs to apply to, and jobs to get rejected from. Yawn! The process is becoming tiresome. I only have but so much money left in the bank, and there are only so many credit cards I can take on before I reach a limit. It's getting old.

As an aside, the universe spoke to me through YouTube, as I found a great video to listen to regarding identity and the mask I've been wearing. The point of it all is to remove the mask of pretense and become who I always should have been.

I hate that I've been waking up more than once at 3 am. My sleep quality has been in the toilet. Hoping to recouperate this weekend.

Wife insists I open more credit cards and play the "balance transfer" game. While I'd rather avoid being in debt up to the tits with credit cards, she might have a point. The job market is only getting worse.

Nonsequitor: we're not ready for aliens.

Ending the working week with a good bit of happiness. A video I heard on YT had it perfectly stated: SMALL VICTORIES MATTER JUST AS MUCH AS BIG ONES

MONDAY

Affirmation: BECOME WHO YOU ARE AFRAID TO BE

Integrate the broken fragments of your identity and face your shadow. Reclaim what you've suppressed to be who you always were.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: YOU DON'T FIND YOURSELF, YOU FACE YOURSELF

The path to individuation starts with an honest look at who you are, not who you pretend you are.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: SURVIVAL IS NOT THE SAME AS LIVING

One should not just rely on being in a constant state of alert to get by. You should be at peace.

Finally found the Cloud Pen Testing Guide I've been actively searching for all this time. It even points to practice sites and HTB boxes.

THURSDAY

Affirmation: SHED THE MASK OF THE PERSONA YOU USED TO SURVIVE TO BE FULLY YOU

Get rid of the old ways, the old patterns, and old reactions that have failed you. It is holding you back.

Dialog with your shadow, make peace with him, then send him off ... mission accomplished!

Instead of follow-up Friday, I'm making today (Thursday) the day to check in on applications a month old.

Re-scheduled "LEG DAY" to Saturday. Woke up feeling far worse than days past, where I had taken an antihistamine to fight off a bacterial infection and hives. No amount of coffee is going to help. I just need good quality sleep, and not wake up earlier than necessary. Some weird dreams last night, for sure!

FRIDAY

Affirmation: GRATITUDE DETERMINES LATITUDE

House cleaning for the mind, body, and soul.

I will make the following declarations for myself:

I will choose what to focus on that moves me towards my purpose.
I will choose discipline over comfort.
I will not revisit or ruminate over every disappointment, mistake, hurt, or failure.
I will give my attention to things that strengthen me.
I will be mindful of what enters my mind because thoughts become patterns. Patterns become habits. Habits become character. And character influences destiny.

SATURDAY/SUNDAY

Affirmation: DON'T LOOK BACK ... KEEP MOVING FORWARD!

Once again the universe spoke to me through YT. The moral of the stories, either through a Korean parable, the story of Lot and his wife, or Orpheus & Euridice is: never look too hard at the past, with fondness or envy, while moving to a new future or you will find yourself punished for it. This can mean anything from repeating old patterns, to never really embracing the future because you are stuck in the past. For my sake, it means never bringing the past into the present with the hopes of a better future, because that almost never works out.

After a good long walk, we did the inner work to celebrate our wins, learn from our losses, and work on earning self-respect. I will not be spoken to with venom or disrespect. I will not allow rudeness and insults into my space. I will not punish myself for the sins of the past. Instead I will learn and keep moving.

What We’re Grateful For

A happy home, loving wife, thriving son, and new opportunities in the week to come.
YT taught me that, for all my past hurts and failurs, I need to extract the meaning and keep moving.
I am happy that I had the difficulty and disappointment. It taught me where I need to improve but it doesn't own me. It doesn't define me.
Despite not having an income, I'm happy to have some kind of money in the bank.
Even without work, there is food in the 'fridge, I have a bed to sleep on, and I have a roof over my head.

What We Loved

Learning new things!
Loving my new glasses! Reading so much more.
I know this unemployment season is temporary.

What We Learned

This season is temporary. It will turn around.
I will not assign permanent judgment to temporary discomfort.
My purpose will guide me.

The focus this week is all things Cloud Security!!

TO DO

[Cloud Sec.] Module 2 - Cloud Security - https://www.skills.google/course_templates/1300/video/609074 (next week)
[WEB PT] - Paused!
[API PT] - Paused!
]ANDROID PT] - HEXMAP - ANDROID BROADCAST RECEIVERS: Paused!

IN PROGRESS

[AI PT] - need to start academy and the tutorials.
[WRITE] - "Husb."
[WRITE] - SUBSTACK .. need a topic.

DONE

[AI PT] - Genbounty: Finish profile
[Cloud Sec.] Module 1 - Intro. to Cloud Computing
[WRITE] - Medium blog post
[READ] - Intro to Cloud Pen Testing (HTB)
[READ] - AWS Pen Testing Guide (HTB)

What We Longed For

A good job, either as AI Red Team, Security Consultant, or QA Engineer.

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market

Sunday, October 4, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday October 2, 2026 - “Autumnal Chill” Ed.

Highlights for the week

BSidesNYC 0x06 .. got my ticket, signed up to Volunteer ... LET'S GO!!!

MONDAY

Affirmation: WORK HARD AT BECOMING WHO YOU ALWAYS WERE

Remove the mask and build the habits that lead to success.

Authenticity means never having to apologize for who you are or compromise your integrity to fit in.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: KILL THE IDEALIZED IMAGE OF WHO YOU "SHOULD" BE

Instead, focus on being your best present self as you work to drop all pretense of living up to a standard set by others, and live for the standards you've set for yourself.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: PRACTICE MINDFULNESS

You had a morning issue with something that slipped your mind. Learn from it, but don't dwell on it. You filed an incident report with yourself and recognized where you went wrong. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep moving. Forgive yourself. Apologize. Take ownership. DON'T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN!!

THURSDAY

Affirmation: THE DAY YOU STOP ABANDONING YOURSELF IS THE YOU REALIZE YOU WERE NEVER BROKEN

... you were simply ignoring who you were to fit in.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: REMOVE THE MASK, STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF

You don't fit in because you don't wear the mask of someone trying to fit in. Focus on making things happeng and getting sh** done.

SATURDAY/SUNDAY

Affirmation: KEEP GRINDIN’

Liberty Tiki idea in full effect.

What We’re Grateful For

EVERYTHING .. especially getting over my cold
Happiness is a full 'fridge

What We Loved

Hitting 90% of my goals this week. Considering the priorities of food shopping and paying the bills, it was a phenomenal week.
Two weeks til BSidesNYC

What We Learned

TO DO

Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Medium .. need inspiration
Write - Substack .. need inspiration

IN PROGRESS

Write - "Husband" .. Enzo is poisoned; The Queens reunite and prepare for battle
Side Project - "Liberty Tiki" -- had an awesome saturday conceptualizing a point-of sale system. Need to think about the business plan.

DONE

Web PT - Optus
AI PT - Wraith CTFs - 96% done .. 1 remains, and it's a tough nut.
Android PT - HexMAP: Learned about bound services and how SERVICES in general can be an attack surface. Will need to make time to circle back and get the flags.
Network Security - Module 3:Device Hardening .. took the stupid cumulative quiz 5x before passing with a 100%. Kept bombing the "select all that apply" questions.
Reading - Network Security
Reading - "Zorro" .. got my glasses and finished the book.

What We Longed For

A good job in as a pen tester or QA automation engineer.

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market and the bs recruiters with their rejection letters, only to see the job reposted a week later.

Sunday, September 27, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 25, 2026 - “Fall Equinox Season” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Life goals: BUILD THE LIFE THAT REFLECTS YOUR VALUES

Kicked off the week with much needed sleep; recovered from the weekend. Woke up Monday with the slightest cold. No gym today :'(

Goals-wise, need to get back in the rhythm.

Meanwhile, Fall is around the corner, and the vibes are so awesome. The air is cooler, the pumpkin spice is flowin', and the spooky season is getting close. What is gross is companies are peddling Christmas decore, bringing it out right on the heels of the Halloween decore. There used to be a rhythm to this:

Late August / early September was Fall Seasonal decore
Mid-September thru October - Halloween Decore
Early November thru December - Christmas Decore

Now .. it's all stacked together like one big consumer psyop; self-soothing from the bullshit of politics, AI doomerism, financial woes, and a ever-worsening job market. LET'S MAKE THE NEXT WEEK MORE PRODUCTIVE!

MONDAY

Affirmation: SICK DAY 1

Not a lot to report. More jobs to search, few to apply to.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: SICK DAY 2

No gym. No jobs applied to. Not feeling my usual self. Even spanish class got bumped.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: Less SICK DAY 3

Your values have always been there, buried behind a mask of pretense. Excavate them and live your truth ... one daily habit at a time. Stop sacrificing your integrity to fit in. BE AUTHENTIC .. 1000 small corrections over a lifetime.

Keeping the promises to yourself is the key to individuation. STOP COMPROMISING YOUR VALUES TO FIT IN!!

THURSDAY

Affirmation: NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS TO BE A LEVEL-10 CRASH-OUT!

Emotional regularity doesn't mean you down play a situation. It simply means you assess the situation and determine the proper amount of energy to devote to it. Not everything deserves a level-10 beserker rage reaction. Sometimes, it's no more than "m'eh."

Fantastic inner dialog proves the inner work is working. The suppressed rage from my childhood is tempered to a weapon I keep sheathed. The shadow is my angry 8yo self that never got the chance to express his rage when being beaten or scolded by his parents. That boy grew to be the teen that never quite fit in, and later the adult that did everything right and still got shafted. We grew up having to do everything the hard way, making tons of mistakes, and never having the proper guidance, role model, or mentor. That calcifies into a person self-reliant and resilience. The motto becomes, "if you're not going to show me the right way, then gtf outta my way. If you're not going to help with a solution, YOU are part of the problem."

FRIDAY

Affirmation: POTENTIAL IS NOT A VIRTUE. IT IS THE THING THAT HOLDS YOU BACK FROM BECOMING WHO YOU WERE MEANT TO BE.

As long as the finish line keeps moving up, you will never become and always be chasing a goal that never comes to fruition. At some point, there has to be an end.

Individuation is a slow and steady grind, not a quick-fix.

When you keep promises to yourself, you build an identity. Break those promises, and you establish the pattern of self-neglect and distrust. You can't be relied on. The shadow keeps a record the mind would rather forget.

You are shaped by the room you no longer live in. SMALL ACTS ACCUMULATE OVER TIME ... DO THE RIGHT THING!!

SATURDAY/SUNDAY

Affirmation: KEEP GRINDIN’

The sum of everything you rejected in order to feel accepted or loved; its been working silently against achievement of your potential in order to protect you.

And discipline is the conscious mind forcing a decision the unconscious mind has decided is dangerous.

What We’re Grateful For

Another week of good health (despite being slightly sick on Monday.
Always grateful for the family, food, and faith I have.
Grateful that I was able to transfer money from Discover to Checking account so I have a reprieve of two more months.

What We Loved

This was a low week and spent the time time getting better. Didn't really hit my goals.

What We Learned

TO DO

Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Android PT - HexTree
AI PT - Wraith CTFs - not done {sick!}
Network Security - Module 3:Device Hardening
Reading - "Zorro" .. waiting for reading glasses
Write - Medium
Write - Substack

IN PROGRESS

Web PT - Optus .. the API is blocked; the Network isn't resolving; Focused on the login
Write - "Husband" .. Enzo is poisoned; The Queens reunite and prepare for battle

DONE

SICK ALL WEEK

What We Longed For

Bigggest longing of all is for BSidesNYC '27 .. can't wait
A good job as a Security Consultant.
Will settle for a job as a QA Engineer, or testing AI

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market
The current president and administration. They are literally doing the opposite of "making America great."
AI Companies like OpenAI and Anthropic committing felonies and getting away with it.
Microsoft not paying NightmareEclipse the bounty they deserve. The consequence is more vulnerabilities found

Sunday, September 20, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 18, 2026 - “September Chill” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Had a tremendous weekend of "productive chillaxation." And by that I mean, I had a horrible Friday night's sleep going into saturday and I was pretty much a zombie. I managed to get some writing done, but the scheduled leg workout was postponed. So I spent the afternoon doing coding as well, and watched a movie with the missus. Also made tacos.

Sunday was a different matter. I woke up late, well-rested and full of vigor. After our late breakfast, I managed to finish up the AI project I was working on and added some tests. I also polished up the HTML styling. If I invested more time, I could probably make a theme, but whatever. The tests pass, and the styles successfully apply dynamically when the report is generated.

Mondays are notoriously bad regarding job hunting. Also, been on a SHADOW WORK kick. Finding some gems.

As of 2026, writing is still a viable career, but it requires you to be adaptable, skilled, and persistent. Specialization helps.

Random text

MONDAY

Affirmation: THE PARADOX OF SELF-SABOTAGE: CAUSING THE CHAOS TO PROTECT FROM HARM

Progress and/or peace are sabotaged by unconscious associations the shadow makes to avoid its demise. Because self-actualization and growth, peace and prosperity, even love, mean growth. So the shadow keeps you at a familiar level by doing dumb shit to preserve itself.

Solution: integrate and evolve.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: WE ARE NOT FAILING DUE TO A LACK OF ABILITY. WE ARE FAILING BECAUSE ...

We are stuck because there are internal voices older than ourselves telling us that it is safer not to change. We need not fight this but rather work with it. Reconcile the notion that change is necessary. We deserve it.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: SELF-TRUST BEGINS WITH THE WILLINGNESS TO ACCEPT THAT FAILING IS LEARNING

Say this when doubts creep in: IU may e wrong bur I trust myself enough to choose. And if I fail, I will learn. If new information appears, I will change. But ai will not surrender nor will I quit, or wallow in negative self-talk.

I TRUST MYSELF .. FLAWS AND ALL

THURSDAY

Affirmation: AMBITION, ANGER, EVEN TENDERNESS, ALL LIVE IN THE SHADOW - K. JUNG

The goals is to quit denying or repressing the parts that are unseen, and integrate them into who you were meant to be.

The person you are proud of does not require you to invent something new. It requires you to stop abandoning the old patterns.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: YOU ARE NOT BROKEN, YOU ARE UNCONSCIOUS OF A PATTER THAT ONCE PROTECTED YOU AND NOW LIMITS YOU - K. JUNG

What have been avoiding? Busy .. productive .. it all prevents stillness.

What do you ACTUALLY want, not what you were taught to want?

SATURDAY/SUNDAY

Affirmation: KEEP GRINDIN’

statement for any relevant fun side projects

What We’re Grateful For

Grateful for a full 'fridge and happy home.
Grateful that I have some money left in the bank .. next month will be a different story.

What We Loved

Had a gloomy end to an otherwise beautiful and productive week.

What We Learned

TO DO

AI PT - Wraith CTFs - Spent a small bit of time with the CTFs on the site. So far, I've completed 20 of 23 challenges.
Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 = Module 2
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Medium
Write - Substack
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section. Fell behind on this.

IN PROGRESS

Android PT - HexTree ... the next module is TBD.
Write - "Husband" .. chipping away at the latest chapter, where Enzo (sixOne's son) is in DMNO4 (fka Daemonia).

DONE

Read - "AD Exploitation with Metasploit"

Second side project for the weekend, using Gemma 4 and python .. superb test coverage for this bit of work.

Canva PT - Report is 100%. Focused on Web and AI; API was blocked, and other links were broken.

What We Longed For

A job ... at this point, any thing that brings in a decent income will suffice.

What We Loathed

The 2026 Job Market - seeing jobs I was rejected for get reposted is the worst.

Friday, September 11, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 11, 2026 - “Rememberance Day” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Weather has been bliss Sunday and Monday. Sunny skies, cool breeze, and an air of excitement for what fall is about to bring. Also excited because son starts his trade school this week. Time is moving on regardless of how ready I am or not. Fifteen months of unemployment is getting old, but I don't miss having a bad job. I just miss having a paycheck.

MONDAY

Affirmation: THE SHADOW IS YOUR SELF WAITING

The ego writes stories to protect self image. Identity can become a psych prison if you let it. Face the shadow and become aware of who you are.

Had a peculiar dream. I was at a random party with people I knew from high school, including a close friend. I remember having this need to speak to him about something, but he kept dodging me. Several girls ran interference and kept me away from him. I just remember thinking this was about old issues that need to be finalized but he wasn't having it. At some point I rememeber thinking, "f** it, I'm going home. So I made my way to a dark parking lot and jumped into this ragged white pick-up truck that suddenly started spinning out of control. I remember having to stick my foot out and plant it firmly to the ground to stop the spinning. That's when I woke up. Mind you, it was 4 am. This wasn't just a dream. I have to believe this was a message. Hence my thinking about shadow work.

Job hunt-wise, Mondays are notoriously sparse for leads.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: UNTIL YOU MAKE THE UNCONSCIOUS CONSCIOUS, IT WITLL GUIDE YOUR LIFE AND YOU WILL CALL IT FATE - K. Jung

Time to face your shadow .. fix what is broken .. heal and grow

Thinking yesterday's dream and recollection of past failures super-early this morning is paving the way for something bigger. Gotta prepare for it.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: THE PERSONAE IS THE MASK WE WEAR TO FACE THE WORLD

.. it is not the real you , but rather the you the identity of conformity; belonging, fitting in, people pleaser, and a do-gooder. To confront the shadow is to remove the mask and come face to face with who you really are.

THURSDAY

Affirmation: NONCE

Quiet day; no gym or anything else. Woke up earlier than I wanted and feel like a zombie.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: NEVER BE AFRAID TO ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF

Know your value: Know your worth. Yes, you messed up. Yes, you broke it (again!). You are not an idiot. Stop beating yourself up. Learn >> Do >> Grow.

What We’re Grateful For

Happiness is a full 'fridge.
13 months and I've matured a lot. This was necessary time to heal and learn.
Grateful for the positivity despite the lack of job leads. I'm going to be ok.
I get to wake up with joy in my heart, despite the lack.
Grateful that my best days are still ahead of me.

What We Loved

Loved the learning moments.
Loved to watch my son getting to move forward in his life.

What We Learned

TO DO

Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 = Module 2
Write - Substack Article .. need a fresh idea.
AI PT - Wraith WCAP Cert. - [PENDING] Cost is $200, 24-hour window, score is based out of 1600 (70% is passing)
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Medium
Write - Substack
Read - "AD Exploitation with Metasploit" ... it's been on-hold while I get another things to done. It's a hard read.

IN PROGRESS

Android PT - HexTree ... the next module is TBD.
API PT - Canva [Status: BLOCKED!] Filed a system bug ticket with CANVA stating an issue encountered after following the prescribed steps to interact with the API.
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section. Fell behind on this.

DONE

AI PT - Wraith CTFs - Spent a small bit of time with the CTFs on the site. So far, I've completed 20 of 23 challenges.
Side Project w. HTML prototype is done. There's a system error shown because it can't find the API key (I'm using a .env file)
Second side project for the weekend, using Gemma 4 and python to log user prompts and test the script with pytest, SQLite3, and basic html

What We Longed For

A solid job. Titles, in order of most desired: Security Consultant, AI Red Team, QAE

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market
The current administration.
AI companies .. all of them. They are screaming threats of human extinction within the next 10 years or so ... really?! What the actual f**?!

Friday, September 4, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 4, 2026 - “Fall Season” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Kicking off another proming week, manifesting success, and finding my purpose. I'm trusting the Universe to guide my towards my purpose. If that means not landing a bad job, so be it. I was incredibly proud of my interview last week and how it all went. Their decision is what it is. What was meant for me will not pass me by. That being said, I desperately need a job.

Second highlight of the week was the "travel planner app." I expanded on the tutorial to include location time and temperature, Model fallbacks for when the primary model fails, and a suite of tests. More on that to come, and I may even expand the forshore app.

MONDAY

Affirmation: YOU ATTRACT SUCCESS BY THE PERSON YOU BECOME - Jim Rohn

Keep going ... moving towards your goals. Build trust in yourself by your daily actions and follow-thru.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: DISCIPLINE IS THE BRIDGE BETWEEN GOALS AND ACCOMPLISHMENT

The test is to act when you don't feel like it or aren't motivated. Simple, not easy.

While I did get the chance to finish up on the module I was targeting, I may need to revisit it on Thursday.

Took my shot with SOPHOS. At this point in the job search, I half expect "No" instead of "Yes". Not that I'm manifesting rejection, but taking a more pragmatic approach instead.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: CHOOSE TO SNOOZE OR CHOOSE YOUR GOALS

Small daily decisions repeated over time become your life.

The decision to focus on yourself.
The decision to exercise.
The decision to learn.
The decision to improve 1% every single day.

Closing out Wednesday on a high after a sluggish start. Let's celebrate accomplishments:

First round interview with Enrollment123 .. was a bot, but who cares.
Learned about SNYK and agentic pen testing for a company - YALO. I should look into them.
Learned about Google Cloud + AI use to track down a missing shipping container. The technical difficulties while spectating the video were a buzz kill.
Played the role of junior SDET where I got to resolve some bug fixes for the travel planner script using Copilot to review the code and provide solutions. Literally 3 hrs of work rather than 2 weeks. AWESOME!!

THURSDAY

Affirmation: THE PRIVILEDGE OF A LIFETIME IS BECOMING WHO YOU ARE - K. JUNG

The best life is the one well-lived, free of any mask or pretense. You shouldn't have to adopt a personae to fit in, be valued, or become seen.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: WHEN THE MIND ASKS "WHAT IF I FAIL?" ANSWER, "WHAT WILL I LEARN? - A. Watts

Old patterns repeating themselves or manifestation? Either way, you are not your past; your old habits or patterns of belief. You are destined for better, so become better to do better.

Ended the week on a great high! Opted out of an impersonal recruitment process. Had not spoken to a single human person the entire time and they wanted me to record a video, then take a tech assessment. Hard pass.

What We’re Grateful For

Grateful for the family, and wife who is an amazing cook
A full 'fridge and money in the bank for now
Just happy to be motivated to keep getting 1% better.

What We Loved

Lorenzo will be starting trade school soon ... wish I were more of a provider, but so proud of him.
End of August and the 'fridge is full ... grateful and loving this

What We Learned

TO DO

AI PT - Wraith WCAP Cert.
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Substack Article .. need a fresh idea.

IN PROGRESS

API PT - Canva [Status: BLOCKED!]
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section.
Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 = Module 2

DONE

AI PT - Wraith Module 11 - easy module to understand ... think "manchurian candidate" for LLMS. Need to re-read and take notes when time allows.
QA - U-Test: 1 Bug Accepted; 3 Bugs Rejected - UTEST is an absolute joke!
Unintended Side Project - I followed a tutorial to build a Travel Planner using Gemini, then composed a test plan and mapped a few test cases for it.
Write - Next Medium blog post was dedicated to the lessons learned from my experience with uTest.

What We Longed For

A decent job .. leaning really hard towards AI red teaming.

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market
U-Test Moderation

Friday, August 28, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday August 28, 2026 - “Rage Against The Void” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Hitting my goals and seeing a bunch of progress with the workouts. While I'm patiently waiting for BrainPOP, the job market is m'eh.

Ended another great week feeling good about myself. I hate not having a job, but I don't miss working at a crappy place, for a bad manager.

Once I get done with AI Pen Testing, I'll probably take the certification, then move to cloud stuff.

MONDAY

Affirmation: THE UNIVERSE IS NOT DONE WITH YOU

Kicked off the week with a new set of goals and highlights. Got to read a little and write a little, as well as addressing outstanding issues.

The "Memory Poison" module was great, but a metric ton of information it digest. I solved

TUESDAY

Affirmation: ACT AS IF GOD IS WITHIN YOU

...because he is.

So I got 2 U-Test tickets rejected as Works As Designed - Will Not Fix. This was after waiting two months deliberating the decision. The rage and frustration is beyond! What I am not going to do is take it personal, because as I learned the other day, the judgement of the issue is not an indictment of my worth, even when the platform statistics say otherwise. So here is where I want to celebrate the win, despite the outcome:

What Went Well

Tested a couple of decent applications for Android.
Learned some new skills to keep an eye out for apps.
Found some bugs that should have been accepted.
Presented the issues in a way that was easy to follow; strong improvement on communications skills .. something you had been lacking for a while.
When it came time to dispute the issues, you presented the facts in a clear and concise manner.
You went up the chain of command and presented your case devoid of emotional rage.

What Went Wrong

4 Tickets were rejected which sent my rating to the absolute lowest.
Of the 4 tickets, 1 was accepted with a $3 payout, 2 were WAD despite the validity and context provided, and the last is a valid issue that is waiting for a final outcome.
It took several months of back-and-forth communication to get to some kind of resolution.
Still at a "Proven" rating, possibly worse since my graph is scraping the bottom of the ratings graph.

Actionable Next-Steps

Continue to upskill in manual testing ... you did good, but you can always be better.
Keep working on bug reporting ... you presented your issues well.
Keep it professional: Yes, your bugs were rejected. No, it isn't personal. In the absence of proper project documentation, you presented what you thought were valid issues in a clear and concise manner. Keep up the good work!

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: THE VOICE IN YOUR MIND IS NOT THE ONE DRIVING

Avoid the unnecessary distraction of listening to the thoughts that don't serve you. Focus on what moves you forward.

Calmness is not avoidance, but rather a proper state of being when everything is chaotic. You don't react impulsively. Instead, you read, relax, then respond. The stillness becomes the magnet most will gravitate to when things go tits-up!

THURSDAY

Affirmation: GREAT LEADERSHIP!

The nuance of great leadership: greatness comes from setting high standards, maintaining high accountability and developing meaningful relationships. All with a smile!!

In not-so-great news, I did not get the job at BrainPOP! Seems like they went with the standard line of "found other candidates that better align with the role" bs. While I am disappointed, I'm not fretting. I prepped for the job like a boss, answered the questions the right way, and made a solid impression. After that, it is truly in God's hands. Also, they have a 3.8 rating on Glassdoor, with several comments about crappy management and disorganized systems .. so there's that. On to the next!!

FRIDAY

Affirmation: HACKING SELF SABOTAGE

Perfect way to close out the week with this proper 4-step method to overcome the past instances of self-sabotage, feeling like a failure, and not achieiving my true potential:

BECOME WHO YOU ARE NOT WHAT YOUR HISTORY SAYS YOU ARE (Nietze)

Change the self-image that you are a failure by feeding it evidence of accomplishments and "wins"
Set the finish date far into the future.
Pick 1 thing that matters and give it 100% commitment.
Estimate the cost of failure properly. Imagine worse case scenario

What We’re Grateful For

Grateful to still have money in the bank, even while I patiently wait for the opportunities to present themselves.
Food and family.
Seeing my fitness progressing steadily.

What We Loved

Proud to have Wife part of the testing program.
Proud to see Lorenzo making progress, both in fitness and in Spanish.
Loved the "Job Hunting Like A Hacker" All-Day Session with Jason Blanchard. I didn't really learn anything new, because I was already doing most of it, but it was a great lecture.

What We Learned

TO DO

Network Security - MODULE 2
AI PT - Wraith Module 11 [Status: TO DO!]
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
WRite - Substack Article .. need a fresh idea.

IN PROGRESS
API PT - Canva [Status: BLOCKED!] .. filed support ticket requesting clarification on scope
Writing - Completed first part of "Husb" chapter 72 .. got more good ideas in the works
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section.

DONE

Android PT - Android BBH. This is applicable to the native .apk produced by google. It is a bit complex and requires a lot of time to get good at.
Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 .. started this on Wednesday 8/26 {MODULE 1 - DONE}
BBH - 3 support tickets on Bugcrowd
WEB PT - Canva
AI PT - Wraith Module 10
QA - U-Test: 1 Bug Accepted; 2 Bugs Rejected; 1 Dispute. Total Payout: $3.00 ... I fully intend to quit U-Test the nanosecond I land a job.
Write - Next Medium [DONE!] Wrote a decent article about anger management when reports get rejected.

What We Longed For

Looking forward to BSidesNYC in October.
As always .. longing for that Security Consultant job. Happily accept QA Engineer as a close second.
Waiting to hear back from BrainPOP. Will probably give it until Friday before the follow-up email. [UPDATE!!] Didn't get it
Waiting to hear back from the pending bug ticket in U-Test.

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market is the worst and not getting better as we creep into September.
Seeing old jobs I've applied to get reposted weeks, if not months later, is really irritating.
U-TEST is literally the worst. For some, it has been great. Speaking for myself, it has been trash.