Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday August 23, 2024 - "IT FINALLY HAPPENED" Ed.

Highlights for the week

Epic Highlight of this week ... after waiting for nearly 2 weeks, the job offer came and it is official .. I have a job. Not just any job, but the job. I will be a Security Consultant Level-1. I presume that puts me one notch above absolute newb, but it also means I have to come correct. The opportunity is everything I want, stem to stern. Which is probably why I feel so terrified.

On the one hand, I've been spending the last 2 years of unemployment focused on pivoting out of QA. I never wanted to get into software testing, and was beginning to develop a long standing frustration for it. Automation was a great feather in the cap as it made me a little more employable. But there was an inner resentment that I just couldn't shake. My last employer was phenomenal beyond words. I worked with amazing people doing something really cool. The pay was perfect. That I was on placed on a PIP (for the 3rd time in my career) meant the job was headed in a direction incongruent with how it started. Security was always top-of-mind and made sure no matter what the role, it was included. I feel as prepared as I'll ever be in that regard.

On the other hand, I feel the onset of unpreparedness creeping in. Like I'm about to take a test and studied from the wrong book. There's a lot that I'm comfortable with, but there's a lot I still don't know. This is both exciting and terrifying. I'm not worried about failing. I'm worried I just won't perform to the expectation becoming the position. Which is incentivizing to really go hard and do better than ever.

In either case, I just don't want this to be Lucy pulling the proverbial football (opportunity) from me last minute. I want to crush this.

What We’re Grateful For

1. It took 2 years of unemployment to finally come face-to-face with the stupid sh** I'd done for the past 15. I never imagined being grateful for being broke and without work, but these past 23 months taught me a lot more than any therapist ever could. My "Husb." story is the output of those lessons, where I am confronted with my own self, forced to own my failures, and finally fix the bugs in my personality. I have a ways to go, but I'm not the person I was 2 years ago. For that, I am grateful.

What We Loved

1. Having a mentor was necessary. I wasn't leveraging him for a job, but that a job manifested itself by way of his connection was amazing! God put some amazing people in my path for a reason.
2. The one big thing I loved about this entire experience was not caving in and losing my mind. I did have a near slip and was at my lowest. I sat at my desk and had a cry. Something I hadn't done since my grandma's funeral. I was down. I was done. I needed to purge all of that out and get my mind right. The video of that dude broke me. I pray he's in a much better place.

What We Learned

1. GraphQL - I learned I was in way over my head. I tried to hop on testing Blue Apron's GQL site and found it a daunting task. Meeting with my mentor confirmed that.
2. SQL - Near-complete with the modules, but I've come a long way towards refreshing a lot of what I had learned back in DeVry along with some new skills.
3. Pen Testing - actually paused due to my new job. I'll probably revisit the learnings in the future.
4. "Husb." - its at twilight. Have to face my 40s.

What We Longed For

1. I can say with all joy, I've not longed for anything ... 'cept maybe a good wife! But that just might be a reflection of what I've been putting out. Time to fix that!!

What We Loathed

1. The Job Market in 2024 - An absolute dumpster fire.