Sunday, August 17, 2025

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday August 15, 2025 - "Vacation" Ed.


Highlights for the week

It has been another quiet uneventful week. Some jobs applied to. Some jobs rejected. The circle keeps turning. I don't quite feel the fire like I once did. I'm trying really really hard to reignite the passion, but I've never been more disillusioned, disheartened, and disappointed in myself. I working on healing and silencing the negative talk, but every-so-often I'm haunted by the failures and the mistakes. Every week that goes by is a week that I kick myself for doing all the dumb sh*** that brought me back to the dark place ... the place I fought so hard for the last two years to get out of.

On a personal level, I've been listening to a lot of Jim Rohn and his videos have helped me get into a better headspace. Some of the quotes include:

  1. Failure is part of the process. YOU'RE NOT A FAILURE - YOU ARE FORMING!!
  2. Falling short is learning.
  3. Keep showing up. Some days will feel like nothing is working. Keep going. Keep showing up for yourself. 1000 imperfect steps

Two main things I want to focus on for this trip: PUROPOSE and REBUILDING TRUST

  1. Purpose: is living in alignment with your values, your standard, not someone else's expectations.
  2. Rebuilding Trust: Rebuild trust by aligning your actions with your values.
  3. Character is built by your habits, repetition, and daily decisions.

Conclusion: Quit doing the dumb shit!! Stay disciplined. Discipline is the highest form of self-love. It rebuilds compassion. It rebuilds confidence and trust .. one small action at a time. One win every day. Stay consistent. Repeatedly.

Non-sequitor: I really need to get myself checked out. Feeling all the symptoms of low-t and possibly enlarged prostate.

What We’re Grateful For

  1. Grateeful that I get to wake up and enjoy another week.
  2. Looking forward to the upcoming cruise and much needed escape from the dark cloud.
  3. Grateful that I have the energy and

What We Loved

  1. Love that vacation is next week. Going to rest, relax, reset, and reprioritize. Another cruise w/o a job is icky, but these are not fun times!!

What We Learned

  1. Started a new pen test project given its football season, it only made sense to test NFL.com
  2. Learned about Portswigger's SQL Lab - Visible error-based SQL injection to finish WAHH Chapter 9. Without PRO version, this was a daunting suite of labs.
  3. Completed week 4 of the Network Pen Testing videos. I'll probably double up on the lessons when I come back from break.
  4. WAHH - Chapter 11, just started and learned about some scenarios involving exploiting flaws in business logic

What We Longed For

  1. As always, longing for a paychcek

What We Loathed

  1. The fact AI is becoming the excuse for laying off so many people.
  2. Hating the job hunting process. Getting rejected from a job only to see it reposted is enfuriating
  3. Registered for DOL Cybersecurity training only to find out it was not as advertised

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