Sunday, September 20, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 18, 2026 - “September Chill” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Had a tremendous weekend of "productive chillaxation." And by that I mean, I had a horrible Friday night's sleep going into saturday and I was pretty much a zombie. I managed to get some writing done, but the scheduled leg workout was postponed. So I spent the afternoon doing coding as well, and watched a movie with the missus. Also made tacos.

Sunday was a different matter. I woke up late, well-rested and full of vigor. After our late breakfast, I managed to finish up the AI project I was working on and added some tests. I also polished up the HTML styling. If I invested more time, I could probably make a theme, but whatever. The tests pass, and the styles successfully apply dynamically when the report is generated.

Mondays are notoriously bad regarding job hunting. Also, been on a SHADOW WORK kick. Finding some gems.

As of 2026, writing is still a viable career, but it requires you to be adaptable, skilled, and persistent. Specialization helps.

Random text

MONDAY

Affirmation: THE PARADOX OF SELF-SABOTAGE: CAUSING THE CHAOS TO PROTECT FROM HARM

Progress and/or peace are sabotaged by unconscious associations the shadow makes to avoid its demise. Because self-actualization and growth, peace and prosperity, even love, mean growth. So the shadow keeps you at a familiar level by doing dumb shit to preserve itself.

Solution: integrate and evolve.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: WE ARE NOT FAILING DUE TO A LACK OF ABILITY. WE ARE FAILING BECAUSE ...

We are stuck because there are internal voices older than ourselves telling us that it is safer not to change. We need not fight this but rather work with it. Reconcile the notion that change is necessary. We deserve it.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: SELF-TRUST BEGINS WITH THE WILLINGNESS TO ACCEPT THAT FAILING IS LEARNING

Say this when doubts creep in: IU may e wrong bur I trust myself enough to choose. And if I fail, I will learn. If new information appears, I will change. But ai will not surrender nor will I quit, or wallow in negative self-talk.

I TRUST MYSELF .. FLAWS AND ALL

THURSDAY

Affirmation: AMBITION, ANGER, EVEN TENDERNESS, ALL LIVE IN THE SHADOW - K. JUNG

The goals is to quit denying or repressing the parts that are unseen, and integrate them into who you were meant to be.

The person you are proud of does not require you to invent something new. It requires you to stop abandoning the old patterns.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: YOU ARE NOT BROKEN, YOU ARE UNCONSCIOUS OF A PATTER THAT ONCE PROTECTED YOU AND NOW LIMITS YOU - K. JUNG

What have been avoiding? Busy .. productive .. it all prevents stillness.

What do you ACTUALLY want, not what you were taught to want?

SATURDAY/SUNDAY

Affirmation: KEEP GRINDIN’

statement for any relevant fun side projects

What We’re Grateful For

Grateful for a full 'fridge and happy home.
Grateful that I have some money left in the bank .. next month will be a different story.

What We Loved

Had a gloomy end to an otherwise beautiful and productive week.

What We Learned

TO DO

AI PT - Wraith CTFs - Spent a small bit of time with the CTFs on the site. So far, I've completed 20 of 23 challenges.
Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 = Module 2
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Medium
Write - Substack
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section. Fell behind on this.

IN PROGRESS

Android PT - HexTree ... the next module is TBD.
Write - "Husband" .. chipping away at the latest chapter, where Enzo (sixOne's son) is in DMNO4 (fka Daemonia).

DONE

Read - "AD Exploitation with Metasploit"

Second side project for the weekend, using Gemma 4 and python .. superb test coverage for this bit of work.

Canva PT - Report is 100%. Focused on Web and AI; API was blocked, and other links were broken.

What We Longed For

A job ... at this point, any thing that brings in a decent income will suffice.

What We Loathed

The 2026 Job Market - seeing jobs I was rejected for get reposted is the worst.

Friday, September 11, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 11, 2026 - “Rememberance Day” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Weather has been bliss Sunday and Monday. Sunny skies, cool breeze, and an air of excitement for what fall is about to bring. Also excited because son starts his trade school this week. Time is moving on regardless of how ready I am or not. Fifteen months of unemployment is getting old, but I don't miss having a bad job. I just miss having a paycheck.

MONDAY

Affirmation: THE SHADOW IS YOUR SELF WAITING

The ego writes stories to protect self image. Identity can become a psych prison if you let it. Face the shadow and become aware of who you are.

Had a peculiar dream. I was at a random party with people I knew from high school, including a close friend. I remember having this need to speak to him about something, but he kept dodging me. Several girls ran interference and kept me away from him. I just remember thinking this was about old issues that need to be finalized but he wasn't having it. At some point I rememeber thinking, "f** it, I'm going home. So I made my way to a dark parking lot and jumped into this ragged white pick-up truck that suddenly started spinning out of control. I remember having to stick my foot out and plant it firmly to the ground to stop the spinning. That's when I woke up. Mind you, it was 4 am. This wasn't just a dream. I have to believe this was a message. Hence my thinking about shadow work.

Job hunt-wise, Mondays are notoriously sparse for leads.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: UNTIL YOU MAKE THE UNCONSCIOUS CONSCIOUS, IT WITLL GUIDE YOUR LIFE AND YOU WILL CALL IT FATE - K. Jung

Time to face your shadow .. fix what is broken .. heal and grow

Thinking yesterday's dream and recollection of past failures super-early this morning is paving the way for something bigger. Gotta prepare for it.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: THE PERSONAE IS THE MASK WE WEAR TO FACE THE WORLD

.. it is not the real you , but rather the you the identity of conformity; belonging, fitting in, people pleaser, and a do-gooder. To confront the shadow is to remove the mask and come face to face with who you really are.

THURSDAY

Affirmation: NONCE

Quiet day; no gym or anything else. Woke up earlier than I wanted and feel like a zombie.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: NEVER BE AFRAID TO ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF

Know your value: Know your worth. Yes, you messed up. Yes, you broke it (again!). You are not an idiot. Stop beating yourself up. Learn >> Do >> Grow.

What We’re Grateful For

Happiness is a full 'fridge.
13 months and I've matured a lot. This was necessary time to heal and learn.
Grateful for the positivity despite the lack of job leads. I'm going to be ok.
I get to wake up with joy in my heart, despite the lack.
Grateful that my best days are still ahead of me.

What We Loved

Loved the learning moments.
Loved to watch my son getting to move forward in his life.

What We Learned

TO DO

Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 = Module 2
Write - Substack Article .. need a fresh idea.
AI PT - Wraith WCAP Cert. - [PENDING] Cost is $200, 24-hour window, score is based out of 1600 (70% is passing)
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Medium
Write - Substack
Read - "AD Exploitation with Metasploit" ... it's been on-hold while I get another things to done. It's a hard read.

IN PROGRESS

Android PT - HexTree ... the next module is TBD.
API PT - Canva [Status: BLOCKED!] Filed a system bug ticket with CANVA stating an issue encountered after following the prescribed steps to interact with the API.
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section. Fell behind on this.

DONE

AI PT - Wraith CTFs - Spent a small bit of time with the CTFs on the site. So far, I've completed 20 of 23 challenges.
Side Project w. HTML prototype is done. There's a system error shown because it can't find the API key (I'm using a .env file)
Second side project for the weekend, using Gemma 4 and python to log user prompts and test the script with pytest, SQLite3, and basic html

What We Longed For

A solid job. Titles, in order of most desired: Security Consultant, AI Red Team, QAE

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market
The current administration.
AI companies .. all of them. They are screaming threats of human extinction within the next 10 years or so ... really?! What the actual f**?!

Friday, September 4, 2026

Security Testing Journal Entry | w/e Friday September 4, 2026 - “Fall Season” Ed.

Highlights for the week

Kicking off another proming week, manifesting success, and finding my purpose. I'm trusting the Universe to guide my towards my purpose. If that means not landing a bad job, so be it. I was incredibly proud of my interview last week and how it all went. Their decision is what it is. What was meant for me will not pass me by. That being said, I desperately need a job.

Second highlight of the week was the "travel planner app." I expanded on the tutorial to include location time and temperature, Model fallbacks for when the primary model fails, and a suite of tests. More on that to come, and I may even expand the forshore app.

MONDAY

Affirmation: YOU ATTRACT SUCCESS BY THE PERSON YOU BECOME - Jim Rohn

Keep going ... moving towards your goals. Build trust in yourself by your daily actions and follow-thru.

TUESDAY

Affirmation: DISCIPLINE IS THE BRIDGE BETWEEN GOALS AND ACCOMPLISHMENT

The test is to act when you don't feel like it or aren't motivated. Simple, not easy.

While I did get the chance to finish up on the module I was targeting, I may need to revisit it on Thursday.

Took my shot with SOPHOS. At this point in the job search, I half expect "No" instead of "Yes". Not that I'm manifesting rejection, but taking a more pragmatic approach instead.

WEDNESDAY

Affirmation: CHOOSE TO SNOOZE OR CHOOSE YOUR GOALS

Small daily decisions repeated over time become your life.

The decision to focus on yourself.
The decision to exercise.
The decision to learn.
The decision to improve 1% every single day.

Closing out Wednesday on a high after a sluggish start. Let's celebrate accomplishments:

First round interview with Enrollment123 .. was a bot, but who cares.
Learned about SNYK and agentic pen testing for a company - YALO. I should look into them.
Learned about Google Cloud + AI use to track down a missing shipping container. The technical difficulties while spectating the video were a buzz kill.
Played the role of junior SDET where I got to resolve some bug fixes for the travel planner script using Copilot to review the code and provide solutions. Literally 3 hrs of work rather than 2 weeks. AWESOME!!

THURSDAY

Affirmation: THE PRIVILEDGE OF A LIFETIME IS BECOMING WHO YOU ARE - K. JUNG

The best life is the one well-lived, free of any mask or pretense. You shouldn't have to adopt a personae to fit in, be valued, or become seen.

FRIDAY

Affirmation: WHEN THE MIND ASKS "WHAT IF I FAIL?" ANSWER, "WHAT WILL I LEARN? - A. Watts

Old patterns repeating themselves or manifestation? Either way, you are not your past; your old habits or patterns of belief. You are destined for better, so become better to do better.

Ended the week on a great high! Opted out of an impersonal recruitment process. Had not spoken to a single human person the entire time and they wanted me to record a video, then take a tech assessment. Hard pass.

What We’re Grateful For

Grateful for the family, and wife who is an amazing cook
A full 'fridge and money in the bank for now
Just happy to be motivated to keep getting 1% better.

What We Loved

Lorenzo will be starting trade school soon ... wish I were more of a provider, but so proud of him.
End of August and the 'fridge is full ... grateful and loving this

What We Learned

TO DO

AI PT - Wraith WCAP Cert.
Google Cloud (Coursera) ... still in the backlog.
Write - Substack Article .. need a fresh idea.

IN PROGRESS

API PT - Canva [Status: BLOCKED!]
Reading - "Zorro" ... started the last section.
Network Security https://skills.yourlearning.ibm.com/activity/ALM-COURSE_3947264 = Module 2

DONE

AI PT - Wraith Module 11 - easy module to understand ... think "manchurian candidate" for LLMS. Need to re-read and take notes when time allows.
QA - U-Test: 1 Bug Accepted; 3 Bugs Rejected - UTEST is an absolute joke!
Unintended Side Project - I followed a tutorial to build a Travel Planner using Gemini, then composed a test plan and mapped a few test cases for it.
Write - Next Medium blog post was dedicated to the lessons learned from my experience with uTest.

What We Longed For

A decent job .. leaning really hard towards AI red teaming.

What We Loathed

2026 Job Market
U-Test Moderation