Highlights for the week
The holiday week came and went and I did my best to bring the energy. Not gonna lie, I wasn't feeling it. I was moody and depressed. I was sulking about finances and where I'm at as a man, as a husband, and as a father. Six months out of work and it's scaring me that I may never land another job. The thing I kept harping on was "missed opportunities." I've had chances. I've had opportunities. Am I at the age where I've used up all my tokens? No more lives left .. game over!
I was feeling a certain way and the universe spoke, as it often does, through YouTube. And I was listening to a few videos while working out. I felt a little better. Some common themes were: DONT QUIT .. FOCUS ON WHO YOU WANT TO BE BECAUSE it is never about luck. It is about preparation, opportunity, and discipline.
Remember that EGO KILLS GROWTH.
Remember, You're not walking through the fire alone! God is walking beside you too :) Also, Chiron asks you to heal yourself before you try to heal others. And also that you cannot walk into new opportunities carrying old baggage. You have to set those down and keep moving forward.
YOUR NEXT MOVE MATTERS MORE THAN YOUR LAST MISTAKE!! Stop dwelling on what didn't happen, or that you failed. Focus on what the lesson taught you.
- You didn't meet expectations ... GOOD! You reflect on where you fell short - excellence, work, competence - and build those up.
- You bombed the blog article ... GOOD! Keep writing. The problems were lack of clarity on the assignment and inexperience. You can do better, don't quit.
- You botched a few reports ... GOOD! You were getting better at the end. You failed because of your pride. Stay humble or get humbled.
- You shit the bed with the file upload component testing ... GOOD! You have since taken the steps to upskill and fix your flaws.
- You're weak at API, mobile and network pen testing ... GOOD! These are opportunities for growth. You've already gone through network pen testing and you're doing API now.
- You didn't get your chance to volunteer ... GOOD! You attended BSides-NYC and made a ton of new connections.
- You still need a mentor, but now you get to mentor others
So yeah, these past six months have been instrumental. I've also learned soooo much about AI. There's still more to go. In the end, the goal is to: Be empowered. Love yourself. Check the behavior pattern and fix what isn't working and move forward. Do this for your family and future self. Keep showing up, even when it's hard. Especially when it's hard.
Your past will try to get in the way .. don't let it
What We’re Grateful For
- Every moment is a gift. Focus on the lesson and the blessing.
- Still here .. still breathing.
- Great fam to enjoy the holidays with.
- Staying healthy
What We Loved
- Loved that I have a lot of life left.
What We Learned
- AI Training [Status: Not Started!] - Moved to next week .. so few hours in the day.
- Writing: Chapter "War Cry" [Status: IN PROGRESS!]. Enemies are at the gate; Dee made the plans and DBack is testing the new aircraft.
- Reading: WAHH Chapter 19 - [Status: IN PROGRESS!]. Code Review Topic .. not easy.
- API Pen Testing: Lime [Status: IN PROGRESS!]. Putting APISEC lessons to practice; just wrapped Reconnaissance. Manual testing to follow.
- API Pen Testing Tutorial: [Status: IN PROGRESS!]. Learned about Mass Assignment; BFLA / BOLA
- QA Day: Performance Automation [Status: IN PROGRESS!]. Working on a cool project involving Playwright and K6.
- Mentor/Mentee w. IMANI, Test Cases Lesson: [Status: PAUSED!] Holiday Break!
- API Pen Testing: YNAB [Status: DONE!]. I'm writing this off.
What We Longed For
- As we wrap 2025, longing for a great job that I can grow into.
What We Loathed
- Feeling like a failure is absolutely the most loathsome thing I've had to endure these holidays.
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